my extraordinary......

ex·traor·di·nar·y ~ adj.
Beyond what is ordinary or usual: extraordinary authority.
Highly exceptional; remarkable: an extraordinary achievement.
Employed or used for a special service, function, or occasion: a minister extraordinary; an extraordinary professor.

—Synonyms 1. inordinate. 2. uncommon, singular, rare, phenomenal, special, signal.
—Antonyms 1, 2. common, usual.

i was with some friends the other day who are also mothers. we were talking about what our "thing" was. that one activity that defines us, that makes us who we are. it seems that once we had our babies we lost our "thing". you know before i had BellaRose i sold insurance. i guess that i would not really want that to be my "thing". i am sure anyone can do it if they have the proper training. i also rode horses, and i loved it, still do, although i have not done it in over a year now. that blows my mind. the acitivity that i had put all my focus on and really made me who i am, i have not done in a year. oh i could, and i will, but not yet. i also snowboarded. i loved it. i loved having the wind whipping my face and flying down the mountain not hearing anything but the snow beneath my board. i felt free, just as i did on my horse when we were soaring over fences. but now i have not done anyone of those things that i trained so hard to be. my one friend was saying how she wants to do something extraordinary, remarkable. for some reason that conversation as not left me. i think about it a lot. i think about it when i am at home taking care of my precious baby, and i think about it when i am hanging out with my remarkable friends, and i wonder if i will do anything extraordinary, if i will be known for anything, and then i look at my baby. SHE is my extraordinary, SHE is my remarkable. no one has ever done what i have done, no one, besides Worth and me by God's grace has made a BellaRose and that is phenomenal and special. i guess i am slowly growing a mother's heart. my world has become BellaRose. i can leave her and go out with my friends, but i think about her, and miss her. i know i will win no awards like i did win i rode horses or be acknowledged in front of crowd, but when my baby one day walks across a stage to get a diploma, or flies down a hill on a snowboard, or boats a mighty rapid that will be my reward. i am learning a lot and have learned a lot these past few months. i thought i knew about love, but i had no idea. i love my husband, but he can fend for himself without me. Worth and i are everything to her. we pray we train her up right and to be a good person, and to me that is extraordinary.